The Fires of Tartarus Page 19

  She got up, venom in her eyes as she turned on me. “It's not Dis Pater's fault, it's yours,” she spat. “You were with Dis Pater before Corvus was even born. You have a child together and you're a ... goddess,” she said, saying the word like it was an obscenity. “But you had to have him too, didn't you? You had to walk in and mess up his life. Everything that's happened to Corvus has happened because of you. You're responsible. No one else.”

  I felt my breath catch in my throat and was too stunned to react to stop Lucas, who lunged for her. They crashed to the floor with Lucas' big hand clamped around her neck.

  “You cold-hearted bitch,” he spat, his anger searing the skin of everybody in the room. “You've no fucking idea what it is to love somebody do you? You make out like you adore Corvus but what did you do when he left us? Did you fight to get him back or did you crawl up in a little ball and whine about how you felt? What you'd lost? You make me sick.”

  “Lucas!” I shouted, my voice ringing through the room as everyone looked on in horror. “That's enough,” I said and turned and left the room without another word.

  Chapter 24

  “Jéhenne!”

  Lucas' voice carried from the doorway, and the next moment he was beside me.

  “Jéhenne.”

  I turned to him, ignoring the concern in his eyes. “I need to arrange a donor for Corvus before he believes we really are trying to starve him,” I said, forcing down the emotions that buried themselves into my heart like spears.

  “What? No!” Lucas exclaimed. “I'll deal with that.”

  “No.” I shook my head, running down the stairs without pausing. If I kept talking and planning I might keep the grief at bay. I wouldn't allow myself to think. “I need to be there in case he loses control.”

  “I can do that,” he growled, following right behind me. “There is no need for you to put yourself through it.”

  I shook my head. “No. If something happens, you might not be able to restrain him.”

  “Jéhenne.”

  I got to the bottom of the stairs and walked on, ignoring the fact that he wanted to talk to me until he grabbed hold of my arm, forcing me to halt. “Jéhenne, don't do this.”

  I looked back at him, my eyes blank. “Do what?”

  “Punish yourself.”

  I felt my jaw clench and pulled my arm away. “I'm not.” He caught hold of me again, both arms this time, forcing me to turn and face him.

  “I never knew Corvus in his human life, Jéhenne,” he said. “Tell me, was he different, was he weak? Easily led? Did you lead him on? Did you use magic to control his mind?”

  “No!” I exclaimed, horrified by the idea. “Of course not.”

  He smiled, his hand rising to cup my face. “Then how can you believe what Cyd said back there?”

  I swallowed. Her words had cut me deeper than she could ever know. The idea that Corvus could've had a normal life, that he would have married and had children, that his line would have carried on as it had always been meant to, had been a burden I'd carried ever since I'd learnt the truth about my past. “Because it's true,” I said in a rush, unable to hold it back any longer. “If ... If I hadn't loved him ...”

  He put his finger to his lips to stop me. “None of us would be here, Jéhenne. Not me, not Cyd, not Rodney and not you either.”

  I blinked hard, the expression in his eyes too soft for me to look at and keep my composure. “Corvus was a grown man, and from what I understand he was a brave one.”

  I nodded, and he echoed the movement.

  “He knew what he was doing.” His voice was firm, but I knew that wasn't true.

  I shook my head. “No. He didn't understand, not really. I tried to tell him ... Tried to warn him ... H--he wouldn't listen”

  Lucas smiled at me as I stumbled over my words, and I realised what I'd said. I had tried. I'd tried not to love him, to stay away from him. But I couldn't and neither could he. It hadn't been a choice at all.

  I closed my eyes. “Thank you,” I said, and he nodded pulling me into a hug.

  “That's what I'm here for.”

  I laughed despite the misery in my heart. “So er ... you and Corvus?” I waggled my eyebrows at him. “You spent a lot of time hugging did you?”

  He narrowed his eyes at me. “He'd been a vampire for a thousand years before he turned me. He really wasn't the hugging type.”

  I'd meant it as a joke but now I wanted to know. “What was he like then? Was he like the man I knew or ... Like the one we have now.”

  Lucas shrugged. “He was very controlled by the time I became part of the family. There were strict rules to our behaviour already, unlike in many families. He hadn't yet forbidden us to always feed without killing, but even then our kills were strictly limited and had to fit certain profiles or we'd be punished or even banished from the family.” He saw my frown and smiled. “This was a revolution for our kind at the time, Jéhenne. Many hated him for it, but that's why many other families were destroyed when they got careless and drew attention to themselves. Ours is one of the biggest and most powerful remaining in the world and that's because of him, because he always thought ahead.” I saw him frown this time, lost in thought.

  “What is it?”

  He looked at me in shock. “I ... I've just realised. All the planning for the future, his determination that the family should be strong and powerful, the ban on killing ... It was for you.” I swallowed, seeing the emotion in his eyes was making it harder to keep it together. “I knew he was waiting for you to come back, but I never realised that ... he planned it ...”

  “He said that?” I asked, my voice thick. He nodded.

  “He'd begun to give up hope though. I knew it. The last hundred years or so he'd spoken less and less about his plans. He'd stopped taking such an interest in ... Well in anything really. And when you did come back ...”

  “What?” I pressed, eager to hear more, needing to know everything I could.

  He paused, shaking his head. “He was insane for those first days after he'd seen you.” He looked away, and I could feel he was shielding his emotions from me. I didn't know what he was hiding, but I was too eager to hear the rest to question it. “Because of Inés and her hatred of him, he felt certain it was a trap, but I knew ... I knew how badly he wanted it to be true.” For a moment there was anger in his eyes that I didn't understand, but then he looked back at me and stroked my face with his hand. “He was so afraid, Jéhenne.”

  I took a breath, my chest tight, and he spoke again. “I'd never known him lose control, to let slip his emotions and allow me a glimpse of the truth. I was always kept out of his personal thoughts ... Until you arrived. He couldn't hide it after that, not where you were concerned.”

  “Oh, Lucas,” I said, desperation to have Corvus back as he was sweeping over me. “What am I going to do?”

  He shrugged and gave me a crooked grin. “Don't give up, I guess.”

  I nodded and hugged him back. His words had lightened my heart a little. Corvus had changed before. He had thought and considered and made changes. Maybe, if I could spend time with him, make him see the world how it was now ... Maybe he could do it again.

  ***

  As I walked to Corvus' room I knew it was going to be hard. More than anything I wanted to do as Lucas had offered and not know anything about it but that wouldn't change the facts and it might put lives in danger. I couldn't risk it. I had to be there when he fed.

  I'd let Lucas choose the donor. If it was my choice he'd end up with a fat old man but at least this way he couldn't blame me. It had to be someone new, someone who had never known or seen the previous Master. Lucas said he'd sort it, and I trusted him so there was nothing else to be said. As I approached I saw Lucas waiting with a young woman. She was attractive in an aggressive kind of way, with short, bleached blonde hair and blue eyes. Dressed all in black with a short skirt and knee high boots she was standing with her arms folded and tapping her foot. I noticed there was
a small diamond glinting in her nose and a ring through her lip, and she certainly looked eager to say the least. She was also tall, as tall as Lucas and extremely skinny, all angles and sharp planes. Not his type at all, I thought with a sigh of relief and gave Lucas a smile of gratitude. He winked at me.

  I stood in front of the door, ignoring the girl who glared at me. I was too stressed to be polite and I hated her on principle. I didn't care if that was fair or not. I closed my eyes and sought out the key. I needed to be strong in front of him, I needed to keep my emotions hidden, and I knew I wasn't capable of that. The power of the key should shield me though, block out anything that might give me away and give Corvus pause if he decided to try anything.

  I took a breath and walked in, closing it in the face of the girl, and I heard her complain to Lucas just before it shut, demanding how much longer she was going to be kept waiting.

  As I entered. Corvus was pacing, his eyes glittering, the black already swamping the blue. He knew of course the girl was outside, could smell her blood even if the spells I'd set meant he could hear nothing outside of the room.

  “Are you taking her place then, mistress?” he sneered.

  I gritted my teeth and gave him a pleasant smile, walking past him to lean against the window ledge. I'd forbidden the family to call me mistress. It had too many uncomfortable connotations as Corvus well knew. “I'm sorry, I realise how very much you want that but ... No.” I shook my head, laughing a little as though I was mocking his presumption. “Someone like you does not get to feed from me.” I hated the venom in my voice, hated the antagonism between us, but I knew he would take any gentleness as a sign of weakness and use it against me.

  He walked closer, his eyes on me, and I willed my heart not to pick up. “Someone ... like me?” he repeated, one eyebrow raised. “And who else is there ... Like me?”

  There had always been an arrogant edge to Corvus. He could be a cocky bastard but before it had always been combined with a natural charm. If he still had that he wasn't bothering to use it on me.

  I waved my hand, a dismissive gesture. “Oh, the younger ones I suppose,” I said, meeting his eyes and holding his gaze. “Those who have not yet learned to control themselves.”

  It was deliberate insult, and he knew it.

  “You think I can't control myself?” He gave a bark of laughter. “There is a difference between not being able to stop and not wanting to.”

  “Prove it then,” I replied. “Prove to me you can be trusted and maybe I'll give you some more freedom. Allow you to move around the Château and spend time with the others ... with Kai.”

  He came and sat on the sill beside me, his long legs stretched out, his arm brushing mine. I felt the key and grasped my connection to it harder. I had to keep control and being this close to him was just unbearable. I forced myself to turn and look up at him, to look up into those cool, blue eyes. He held my gaze, and I wished I knew what he was thinking. I could of course let myself into his mind but ... he'd lost so much. To take his privacy from him too, it didn't seem right.

  He reached out a hand and touched my hair, curling one lock around his finger, his eyes clearly admiring the way the lamplight glinted on the red, turning it from copper to gold. I held my breath as our eyes met. The moment stretched on, the tension between us drawn so tight I feared something might snap. He raised one eyebrow.

  “So are you going to starve me after all then?”

  His eyes were mocking, and for a second I hated him. He'd played me in that moment, drawn me into believing he was thinking about something other than the walking blood bag waiting on the other side of the door.

  I shrugged, keeping my feelings buried. “You're the one wasting time.”

  I called mentally out to Lucas, and he came through the door, the girl practically barging in front of him, her eyes settling on Corvus with such greed it was almost as though she was the one being fed. My hatred burned brighter, and I locked down every emotion. I could feel the key, a brilliant light within me, so vivid behind my eyes I was surprised not to see the light shining under my skin. Lucas' eyes found mine, and I saw him take in the fact Corvus was sitting beside me. He didn't like it.

  Corvus looked the girl over. She was standing if front of him, playing with her hair, which looked awkward as it was really too short for that kind of flirtatious move. He got up, his movements slow, a lazy smile curving over his mouth. He looked back at me, his eyes drifting to Lucas.

  “So ... I get to do this with an audience?” he asked, the timbre of his voice implying that he didn't mind one bit.

  “We stay or the girl goes,” I replied, crossing my arms.

  He chuckled. It was a low, dangerous sound that seemed to vibrate through me and take root inside.

  I watched as he moved towards the girl, her smile faltering a little as she realised just what kind of predator she was being given to. She may have fed vampires before but not one like this.

  “Ready to put on a show then, lover?” he asked, sliding one hand around her waist and pulling her back to press firmly against his body.

  I made myself hold his eyes. I would not look away.

  I felt Lucas sit close beside me, our bodies flush together, and I uncrossed my arms, moving away and putting my hands on the window sill. His hand found mine as I knew it would. Not holding it, but just touching, his presence helping to keep me level, stopping me from crying or screaming or killing the girl ... and Corvus.

  I watched as he pierced her skin and tried to block out the girl's moans of pleasure. I'd known of course that he'd do this. He was going to make it as pleasurable as he could for her, so I'd have to watch her writhe and moan and come in his arms.

  So I did. But knowing a thing and having it happen are two different things and in that moment I wanted to die. I watched as his hand drifted up under her top to caress her breasts and the other plunged into the skirt, and I kept my composure despite the explicit images in my own mind of the various ways I could put an end to both of them. Anything to stop the torture that was ripping what remained of my heart into even tinier pieces. The pain was so intense that I wondered if there would be anything left to piece back together when he was done. The girl's cries became more intense as Corvus ground his hips into her, his eyes never leaving mine, and I wanted to be sick, wanted to run away, wanted to kill them both. I couldn't take much more.

  I jolted as I felt Lucas' lips brush against my neck, gentle and warm and for just a moment I felt a flash of white hot, searing anger before it was gone, brought fiercely under control.

  Corvus.

  I felt Lucas squeeze my hand, just a light touch, but I knew what he was suggesting as his breath fluttered against my skin. Was this what I'd been reduced to? I closed my eyes for a moment, feeling the heat of unshed tears behind my eyelids and then angled my neck a little differently so that Lucas could continue. I opened my eyes and looked directly at Corvus as Lucas' hand snaked around my waist, and he shifted closer. His arms closed around me, and I felt protected from the worst of it as Lucas' touch calmed me, our connection soaking up a little of the misery and jealousy of my emotions and taking them away, for a moment at least. I felt the sharp graze of his teeth on the sensitive skin beneath my ear and gave a little breathless gasp, closing my eyes for a moment before returning my gaze, cool and aloof, to Corvus.

  “Please, Jéhenne,” Lucas murmured against my skin. “Please.”

  I knew he was doing it on purpose, but I still didn't want to let him. But then I saw the look in Corvus' eyes.

  I reached up a hand, tangling it in Lucas' thick, dark hair and pulling his head closer.

  “Yes,” I whispered.

  I didn't have to act or put on the groan of pleasure that tore from me as his fangs pierced my skin. Lucas moaned, the sound pure ecstasy as heat and desire washed through me, a wave of need and wanting so intense that for a second I almost forgot where I was as his feelings overwhelmed me. For a second I lost my grip of those carefully he
ld emotions I'd been controlling so hard, and as I opened my eyes I looked back at Corvus. But he wasn't looking at me now. He was staring at Lucas with ferocious loathing.

  I laughed. I couldn't help it. It was full of bitterness and misery, but I laughed just the same and Corvus' eyes snapped back to mine, once more cold and emotionless - uncaring. Liar.

  “Enough,” I said, and Lucas moved immediately away, taking a moment to sweep his tongue over the tiny wounds to seal them and then pausing to press a kiss against my neck, nuzzling a little against my jaw before he sat up again. I didn't need to look at him to see the smug look on his face as he turned back to Corvus.

  “You too,” I said to Corvus.

  It wasn't a command, but I knew he didn't want to.

  “You will stop,” I said, biting out each word.

  I could feel his desire to ignore me, could feel the desire to kill, the need in him to keep going until her heart stopped - could feel him decide whether or not to challenge me.

  A stronger desire to get out of this room won this time, and he released the girl, so suddenly that she dropped like a stone, falling in a heap at his feet. He looked down in disgust and moved away from her, as though she offended him. I fought hard to keep a grip on my control. One slip and there would be flames at my wrists, and if that happened, I didn't know if I could hold back on the rage that boiled inside of me right now, bubbling beneath the surface like a winter sea, seething in my blood. I really didn't know what I might do.

  “Get her out of here.”

  Lucas moved, obeying me instantly, and I looked back at Corvus, who gave me a polite smile.

  “Well then, I've been a good boy, mistress,” he said, his words dripping with mockery. “Do I get to play outside now?”

  “You will address me as Master or Jéhenne,” I replied, ignoring his manner. “And yes, perhaps ...” I looked at him and pouted, tapping my lips with one finger, I watched his eyes follow the movement. “But I think you need a lesson in manners,” I said with a heavy sigh. “So it won't be tonight. Goodnight, Corvus.”